Yes, it’s that time of the year again……
Now, I am of an age to know that setting myself a list of unrealistic aspirational New Year Resolutions is probably going to end in disappointment.
I mean, ideally, the following would be my resolutions. Although, I think I am as likely to stick to these as my daughter is to get the unicorn she always wishes for:
1 Give up wine and chocolate
I would like to be one of those “my body is a temple” people and to be someone who genuinely enjoys eating things like eggplant, kale and celery sticks.
In truth, battered sausage and chips drowned in vinegar from our local chipper is far more appealing to me. I’ve no doubt I will be on a first names basis with our local takeaway by the end of the year.
2. Become a domestic goddess in the kitchen.
This would mean throwing away the take away menus and embracing my inner Nigella (I would need to find her first of course!).
I can just imagine my homemade chutney bubbling on the stove and the smell from my freshly baked bread.
Unfortunately, my culinary attempts often remind me of Pinterest – there’e the picture of how it looks on Pinterest and the actual reality of when I make it……..
(Source: Bored Panda: Pinterest Fails https://www.boredpanda.com/funny-pinterest-fails/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic)
Now, I’m not actually bad in the kitchen but I’m not going to be winning Masterchef. I’m no stranger to the Tesco and M&S meal deals either!
3. Get my youngest daughter to eat better.
My 6 year old is a very fussy eater – dinnertime in our house could be called a “challenge” but really it’s more of a battleground.
I spend hours and hours looking for recipes – you know the ones that hide the vegetables so that she is getting a healthy meal but is still eating something that she likes (I’ll gladly take even kind of likes). Still, she can spot a speck of a hidden chopped carrot at 50 paces.
I cook the meal and put her plate in front of her and optimistically, based on previous experience, (I really should know better by now) wait for her reaction.
First, it will be thoroughly inspected for yucky / poisonous green bits. I hold my breath to see if we make it to Stage 2 – the taste test. This usually involves licking the food on the fork and then either pronouncing it “disgusting” (frequently) or proceeding to take an actual bite (less frequently).
A common mistake, after an actual mouthful has been swallowed, is that I start the celebrations in my head before the final whistle and I start planning how I have this healthy meal in the bag as a weekly regular.
However, what is more likely, is that she will eat a few mouthfuls and then decide she has had enough. That’s when my negotiation skills come into force. My opening offer is that she eats half of what is on her plate, her opening offer is that she eats none.. Usually, we end up agreeing at somewhere around 7 forkfuls.
That’s a win……
Nonetheless, I will plough on full of hope and optimism. Hopefully, that kids cookery book full of healthy but appetising recipes that even my daughter will eat is coming out any day now….
4. Be a better parent
“Be more Mary Poppins, Be more Mary Poppins, Be more Mary Poppins……”
5. Become a fashionista
Not only is it a brand new year but my kids will be starting a new school, we will have new neighbours, be making new friends and be part of a new community. It’s the perfect opportunity for a new image.
I have visions of being the cool glamorous new lady at the school gates with my carefully put together ensemble, styled hair and flawless make up.
In reality, I am a jeans, sweater and trainers girl and I am highly unlikely to get up early enough to put on make up – an extra 10 minutes snooze in bed once the alarm goes off is far more appealing to me.
Thankfully, I am old and wise enough to know who I am and everyone else will just have to take me as they find me.
My Actual Resoloutions
“Be in the moment.” That’s it!
Bring it on 2020 – I’m ready for you!
Happy New Year everyone, make it a good one xx
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